What is a Grandmother?

I was cleaning and found this saved item from the 80's. I remember it came around with the AM absent list from the secretaries Blanche and Shirley (new grandmothers at the time) at school. I thought it was very funny so I am posting it here to share with you all.

What is a Grandmother (Essay by a third grader)

A grandmother is a lady who has no little children of her own. She likes other people's. A grandfather is a man grandmother.

Grandmothers don't have to do anything except be there. They are old so they shouldn't play hard or run. It is enough if they drive us to the market and have a lot of dimes ready. When they take us for walks, they slow down past things like pretty leaves and caterpillars. They never say "hurry up".

Usually, grandmothers are fat. But not too fat to tie their shoes. They wear glasses and funny underwear. They can take their teeth and gums out. Grandmothers don't have to be smart. Only answer questions like "Why isn't God married?" and "How come dogs chase cats?" When they read to us, they don't skip or mind if we ask for the same story over again.

Everybody should try to have a grandmother, especially if you don't have television, because they are the only grownups who have time.